somewhere else.

Pride.

Most of my actions revolve around it. I refuse to give anyone the satisfaction to even think they’re worth and stress and anger. No matter how much you’ve hurt me, played me, did whatever you did to me… I will just leave it. Some think because it’s so easy for me to let things go I think like a man. I don’t. I mean, I don’t like the whole “like a man” thing for a couple reasons but that’s another story.

I want closure just like the next person but my pride gets in the way. The idea of being vulnerable around someone who may or may not feel the same way towards me kills me so I just keep my head up and keep it moving.

I guess it’s a good thing in some cases. There are days were certain things just eat me alive because I never got the answer to my never ending questions. Parts of me wants to know and other parts of me don’t. The parts of me that wants to know seeks that closure. The other parts of me that does not want to know just doesn’t want to face what could possibly be the truth. The truth being that we were on two different levels or mindsets and it’s terrible feeling knowing things aren’t mutual.